tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC December 14, 2011 12:00am-1:05am EST
a matter of trust. and we know, deep down, nobody runs for president alone. >> thanks to terry. jimmy kimmel next. we'll see you back here tomorrow. >> dicky: up next on an all-new "jimmy kimmel live" -- >> jimmy: i tried to write happy hanukkah on my iphone and the auto correct changed it to happy chewbacca. >> dicky: josh holloway. >> you're like sampson would your stubble, aren't you? >> jimmy: wrap the smallest person in your family like a present. make sure the kid can breathe. don't open them until christmas. >> dicky: molly sims. and music from death
>> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel with a word about the new 2013 ford taurus sho. innovative, big on performance and long on attitude. it's almost as if i'm describing guillermo, right guillermo? guillermo? guillermo? i think he's out for the night. >> and that's why you have to work on christmas eve pepe and paco. ho ho ho. guillermo! >> santa? >> we need to talk. oh! i need you to fill in for me this year. >> but i'm not fat enough to be santa.
whoa, okay, now i'm fat enough to be santa. now what do i do? >> all you have to do is believe in holiday miracles. >> i don't understand you. >> do what you do best, guillermo. >> oh, eat and get drunk? >> no, guillermo, dance. sing and dance. >> oh. wow. that's a nice taurus. where did you get it, santa? >> the elves made it for >> really? >> no. now get to work. i'm going to mexico. >> so, i'm santa now? >> guillermo? guillermo? guillermo? >> jimmy: guillermo? >> jimmy. >> jimmy: i said wake up. >> oh, jimmy. oh, i guess it was just a dream. >> jimmy: are you growing a white beard, guillermo?
>> not so funny, jimmy. h ho ho. oh, no. i think i might be santa. >> dicky: don't miss the thrilling conclusion to guillermo-claus and the all-new 2013 ford taurus later in tonight's show. >> jimmy: "jimmy kimmel live," back in two minutes with molly sims, music from death cab for cutie and josh holloway. it's true. 33 miles per gallon. that's amazing. i'm afraid if i say anything else, it will sound like bragging. get a ford fusion with 0% financing for 60 months plus $500 cash back, during ford's year end celebration. year end celebration! she is very excited.
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can i walk to the belvedere hotel from here? here are directions to belvedere hotel. read me that text. new message from sarah russell:'see you soon' do you think it will snow today? it sure looks like snow today. say hello to siri..on the most amazing iphone yet. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- josh holloway. molly sims. and music from death cab for cutie. with cleto and the cletones. and now, you better watch out, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: thank you. hi, everyone. that's very nice. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming and visiting, you made it. [ applause ] that's very nice. i know we have a lot of folks visiting from out of town. there are 12 days until christmas now. just like the song. i looked all over hollywood today. it was unable to find a partridge in a pear tree. but i did find a pigeon in a homeless person's beard. that will have to do. i tell you something, we go to a lot of trouble to celebrate jesus' birthday every year and does he ever end a thank you note? not once. they're called manners, jesus. maybe you could give them a try sometime. my christmas is out of control. there are hundreds of gifts all over my house. my living room looks like a cross between the north pole and "hoarders." by the way, does anyone here
know how to wrap an iguana? you're supposed to put him in a thing first, right? anyway. we're doing a secret santa exchange at the office here, which is -- i think it's weird. you pick a name and if it's somebody you don't really know, some how you have to secretly learn what they like, you have to ask questions about them. maybe follow them to their -- they shouldn't call it -- it should be called temporary office stalker. it was very christmassy today here in los angeles. sunny and 60 degrees. there are some snow just north of here. it hasn't affected traffic on the freeway into town but it does have our local news reporters making some very questionable statements. >> the grapevine is very clear, so, the conditions are good there, just watch out for black ice. >> jimmy: now what? why would he said that? you should be ashamed of yourself. hanukkah starts a week from
tonight. did you know there are more ways to spell hanukkah than there are days of hanukkah? i tried to write happy hanukkah on my iphone and the auto correct changed it to happy chewbacca. which is nice, too, a nice sentiment. kwanzaa starts the day after christmas on the 26th. >> you don't hear much about kwanzaa anymore. seems to have lost some steam since obama became president. i'm not sure why. i don't know much about kwanzaa. i know it's kind of a funny word. but that's about it. i'm a curious type. i like to know what's going on. so, to learn more about kwanzaa, we sent a camera to a jewish deli over the weekend and -- right? well, hopefully this will clear things up. >> i don't know the story of kwanzaa. can you tell me? >> kwanzaa? i have no clue. >> it's an animal, right?
that's what i think. i know, in australia. isn't it? that's what kwanzaa is. >> kwanzaa started ten years ago, well, maybe 15 years ago, here in america, to celebrate -- uh -- they wanted their -- african-americans wanted their own holiday? their own religion -- no, it wouldn't be a religion. it would be a -- to celebrate their own christmas. i guess. >> ah, kwanzaa is the -- i guess the black version of christmas. i played basketball with a lot of black guys, they celebrate kwanzaa. hell, i'll celebrate kwanzaa. >> happy kwanzaa, everybody. >> jimmy: you know what, i feel like we went to the wrong place to ask.
now, that deli happens to be a few doors down from a barbershop called legends. we thought we would ask the people at legends to explain hanukkah? well, it only seemed fair. >> you want to know the story of hanukkah. ah -- i think hanukkah is the beginning, the ending of the jewish holiday or the jewish year? i don't know, i'm not sure. >> i think there's 30 days in hanukkah, right? >> i would say 12. 12 days, yes. >> ah -- only thing i know is, some candles. lots of candles. >> it started with the scottish. they were fighting somebody and -- >> got to light a candle for each night, i believe, you know, they put blood on the door, goes
by, people stay alive. people don't have blood on the door, they die. it's a bad death. ♪ dreidel dreidel dreidel >> and i think you're supposed to wear a yarmulke on hanukkah -- >> what was that episode of "the simpsons?" >> i don't know, i didn't really study for this test. >> jimmy: well, i think -- [ applause ] i think the bottom line is, we all have a lot of learning to do about each other. donald trump announced this morning that he will now not serve as moderator at the gop debate that was scheduled for december 27th. he said he had to cancel the
debate because he may want to run as an independent candidate. and because only two of the gop candidates decided to show up. this guy is something. he's xhirted to the debate, he's not committed, he's running, he's not running. he's in, he's out. what does he think this is, one of miss marriages? thank you. meanwhile, newt gingrich just picked up a major endorsement. gary busey has officially and formally thrown his support behind the former speaker of the house. he endorsed gingrich, then he endorsed a mailbox and the letter "t." [ laughter ] finally good news for mitt romney. you know the reason gary busey is a republican? it's an interesting story. it's because he what lose nates more mel fant elephants than d. speaking of animals that should run for president, somebody sent
me a video today. it was taken at an animal park in washington state, where you drive through and see the animals as you go? and you see animals like this exceptionally friendly bear. >> hi! >> jimmy: isn't that something? let's look at that again. >> hi! >> jimmy: pull over, we can -- [ applause ] we'll hang out. maybe i'll eat your head. we have some fun guests on the show tonight. molly sims is here. death cab for cutie is here. and our old pal josh holloway from "lost" has a part in the new "mission impossible" movie with tom cruise. "mission impossible" premiered in madrid last night. some had how tom cruise wound up on the red carpet with this lady. that's the duchess of alba and her husband. she's very, very rich.
and very, very strange to look at. she's there seeking tom's help to find the dark crystal that can save her species. [ laughter ] i love this photo. i really do. tom looks uncomfortable. the duchess looks nutty. and the husband looks concerned that his money is about to walk away with jerry maguire. here's another shot and -- by the way, why -- why is tom cruise wearing a turtle neck sweater? to protect himself from her fangs maybe? he looks like he's about to release a soft rock greatest hits of the '70s album. this woman, the duchess of alba is worth an estimated 4. $9 billion. some of the money she inherited but a lot of it she made herself, receiving these dolls. [ laughter ] that bear her image. my sister had one of those when we were -- [ applause ] there aren't many shopping days
left before the holidays but if you have been prokras nafting, we're going to help you tonight. we've been monitoring television to help you find the right holiday gift without having to leave your house. so, we're going to play a game here now. see if you can figure out which one of these products, as seen on tv, is fake. we put one fake item among the real ones. see if you can guess which one it is. >> while others toss and turn, trying to get comfortable, you can rest and relax with the snazzy napper. it's the whoa buddy bowl. this year, send them something new. spg personal that's full of love. a great big hug from you, with hug-e-gram. they can experience your loving embrace. >> anthony sullivan her for the fridge locker the easy to use personal, portable foot security tester. this is a real 800-pound grizzly
bear and even he's having a hard time getting into the fridge locker. >> we took the ball. we took the bike. we put them together and it's called the ball bike. >> this is the fully patented thimble. here's how it works. put it on your finger or thumb and just touch, lift and flip. >> the patented gun rack is easily hidden by blankets and sheets. >> it's a legal tender coin that talks. >> my first wish is to see this plague of mankind, war, banished from the earth. >> now, you can get your cell phone off its back and let it sit up where you can see it with happy sack. you will always see who is calling. >> forever lazy is the best way to stay warm outdoors. it will be the talk of your next tailgate and you'll stay comfortable. got to go in no worries. forever lazy has zippered hatches in front and back for great escapes when duty calls. >> now, you can turn new couch
into a home theater with the amazing couch commander. >> reducing typing related stress on your fingers, hands and wrists. >> introducing the happy hot dog man. it brings ordinary hot dogs to life. >> introducing the slop stopper. forget messing spills and unplanted accidents. just clip it on and enjoy your busy life style. perfect for every day use. >> pizza partner can hold up to half of a pizza. >> wow. this is great. i can't wait to use this. >> i just knew pizza would make an excellent gift. >> jimmy: a lot of great stuff. do you know which one was fake? huh? they were all real. [ laughter ] they were, they were all real. and right now, your grandmother is buying them for you.
we have a fun plan tonight for when we come back. these two families are going to go head to head in our skype scavenger hunt. guys, are you ready f? and are you prepared to destroy your homes at all costs to win this thing? all right, everyone but dead. we have a good show for you tonight. josh holloway is here. molly sims is here. we have music from death cab for cutie. and we'll be right back with the skype scavenger hunt, so stick around.
welcome back. tonight on the show, you know him as sawyer from "lost," starting december 21st, you can see him alongsize tom cruise, josh holloway is here. from "project accessory," molly sims is here. and death cab for cutie from the bud light stage. tomorrow night, kathy griffin, jamie bell will be here and music from young jeezy. on thursday, robert downey jr., lenny kravitz and me, jim. all right, let's -- we thought it would be fun to play a game with families at home and they are connected to us through skype video chat. it's time to play a special holiday edition of the skype scavenger hunt. all right. let's meet our families. first, from loveland, ohio,
sandy and butch and their kids bianca, roman and sabrina. how are you tonight? >> good! >> jimmy: butch, how old are you? >> 46, man. >> jimmy: i'm sorry, i meant roman. it's roman, right? roman, how old are you? >> 7. >> jimmy: you said you're 4? just screwing with you. are you fired up about this tonight? >> kind of. >> jimmy: exactly the answer i've been looking for. our next family is from oak park, illinois. they are the centers. joanna and nick and their kids alicia and aubrey. hey, guys. now, that's -- that's the kind of enthusiasm i was hoping to see. what's going on there?
>> don't ask. >> jimmy: still running on that halloween candy fumes, i guess, huh? families, would you like to say hello to each other via sky? >> hello. >> hi. >> jimmy: this is a very simple game. it's a scavenger hunt. you have to find an item and bring that back as fast as you can. and listen closely because i will ask you to complete a task, too, okay? are you ready? >> yeah! >> jimmy: this is for the kids only. bring back a pair of your mom's underpants. go! and -- extra credit for leopard print. not the one she's wearing, too, we're going to need -- the kids are -- god only knows what they might find up there. are you guys looking upstairs or are you looking for help from god?
all right. hopefully the kids won't bring anything unapproved back. all right. what do we have -- there we go. all right. that's -- a win for the wilburn family. those are mom's underpants, huh? >> i don't wear any. >> jimmy: oh, at least they know what to get you for christmas. did the kids get lost or something? >> what's going on, guys? >> jimmy: tell them to come back because the underwear hunt is over. and we're going to move onto our next item. all right, here they come. all right. your next challenge is, wrap the smallest person in your family like a present. make sure the kid can breathe. the most festively wrapped child wins, okay? go! okay, here we go. butch is having some trouble getting off the futon there.
okay. here we go. they got the paper. okay. that's important. smallest kid. they both look like -- okay, i think -- i think we have a winner. i think the spencers have finished first, and i especially like the detail of the -- [ applause ] i like the tube on the outside. all right. and remember, don't open them until christmas. now you look like a drunk. [ laughter ] all right. okay, i have one final challenge for you, okay? everyone come back with santa
beards made out of whipped cream or shaving cream. okay? go! just leave her there -- oh, okay, there she goes. dad, you might as well just wait for the cream. that's very sad. turn that -- okay, we have one santa, we have two santas. we have one real beard. we have three, four -- we have five santas! the wilburns. what is that -- toothpaste? well, you did a great job. i'm going to determine the overall winner. inlt -- you know what, you are each going to be winners, because each of your families wins a 50-inch 3d tv. dicky, tell them more. >> dicky: now, you can video chat with friends and loved ones
on skype, whether they're on their computer, mobile phone or another tv. find out more at skype.com. >> jimmy: skype-enabled television. now, i can watch your show, all right? thanks, families. oh, look who has come to life all of a sudden over there, roeman. all right, thanks, guys. we'll be right back with josh holloway. man. all right, thanks, guys. we'll be right back with josh holloway. oh, big game, guys! what are we having?
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>> jimmy: we have a good show for you. molly sims and death cab for cutie. our first guest tonight once was lost but now is found. he's starring alongside tom cruise in "mission impossible: ghost protocol." it opens december 21st. please say hello to josh holloway. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: very good to see you. >> good to see you. you are looking better every time i see you. what are you on, man? >> jimmy: i'm on drugs. >> excellent. love that. >> jimmy: we had an unusual --
we ran into each other in a very strange spot. at a fly fishing shop in i win, idaho. and i was in the shop and i see you and i think, well, that can't possibly be him. i think you were wearing a cap. >> yeah, and it didn't really happen that way, jimmy. >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> i'm in this obscure place in the middle of nowhere, i had to drive hours to get there, it seemed like, you know? and i'm in there in a fly shop trying to fit in, you know, got my khakis on, i got some pastel thing i would never wear. >> jimmy: you had the gear on. >> buttoned up nice. being conservative. suddenly there's this commotion outside and i'm like, what the hell is going on? i look outside, there's three suvs that pull up. it's entourage gets out, super models and [ bleep ] carrying, like, fly fishing gear. i'm like, is this suge knight?
and out steps jimmy, dressed like ali g. i'm like -- where is his pastel? where is his khakis? he's like, yo, yo, yo, going to do a little, you know, catch and kill, i don't believe in that catch and release [ bleep ]. i'm like, unbelievable, dude. breaking all the rules. >> jimmy: yeah, that was me all right. yes. you forgot the entourage of women that i travel with. >> well, i said that, you know, super models carrying your gear. i think it was a neon pole or something. >> jimmy: you know, did you catch anything that trip, by the way? >> oh, i killed it. >> jimmy: did you? >> how about you? >> jimmy: did you catch anything beautiful like this? >> oh, wow! >> jimmy: monstrous trout. like suge knight did? >> i did not. actually. because i had my brother with me and i'm just that guy. >> jimmy: did you do well? >> we got eight. >> jimmy: that's good. >> how many did you get?
>> jimmy: i don't know. we don't even count. we don't need to count. >> well, we were dodging, like, trees and stuff. it was -- >> jimmy: we had the trees cut down ahead of us. i had a guy with a chain saw. >> of course you did. probably more like an rpg launchers, you know, the way you showed up. >> jimmy: this is something, to be in this movie with tom cruise. they made you into a clean-cut individual for this, right? >> they did. they did. they got there, they said, who's the riff raff, get him off the set. it's me, it's me. they were immediately like, let's get rid of this. >> jimmy: you're like sampson without your stubble, aren't you ? your power is there. >> actually, it's opposite. once i shave my beard off, my little girl will let me kiss her. she had me in the bathroom today, with my razor, take off, dad. i'm like -- i can't.
i couldn't really explain it to her. >> jimmy: she didn't kiss you for six years you were doing "lost?" >> it's harsh. >> jimmy: might have a lawsuit on your hands. >> i know. >> jimmy: you get the call to be in this big movie. tom cruise. you feel like you have to do your own stunts when you're around tom cruise because he does his? >> you kind of do. >> jimmy: yeah, i would think you do. >> you kind of do and then you kind of don't. >> jimmy: in what way? >> when they explain the stunt. >> jimmy: oh. >> you're like -- tom? could you do this for me? he's like, of course, of course, no problem, i do all the stunts. >> jimmy: i got you. >> he does every stunt in the movie. >> jimmy: what is your character? >> well, i'm actually -- >> jimmy: are you a ghost? >> i'm a good guy. i'm a ghost. no, i'm a good guy. i'm one of the imf agents and i do my thing and -- >> jimmy: well, we have a clip here. >> apparently not as good as tom. >> jimmy: well, nobody does it as good as tom.
>> nothat man is a machine. truly, a professional but the stunt work -- hats off, man. that is sick. >> jimmy: are there any stunts in what we're going to see here? >> well, uh -- no. >> jimmy: okay. >> well, there's the drugging stunt which, if you keep at me i'm going to show you. >> jimmy: okay, all right, all right. let's take a look, the clip, the movie is called "mission impossible: ghost protocol." >> now or never, bob cat. >> hurry. delivering the file. what's his name? >> go ahead, shoot. >> we are out of time. i need a name, folks. can't track all these people at once. >> for the love of god! >> you got it? >> stefanski. >> searching.
i'll take it from here. >> jimmy: there you go, that's josh holloway. you look serious without the stubble. >> yeah. >> jimmy: looks more dangerous. >> do i look more dangerous without it? >> jimmy: you do. great to see you. glad everything is going great. josh holloway, everybody. "mission impossible: ghost protocol" opens december 21st. we'll be right back with molly sims. ♪
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with flu complications, including young children. so to kill the germs that may make your family sick, we recommend using lysol disinfectant spray every day. lysol is approved to kill over 50 germs. this includes the cold and flu viruses that can live on surfaces for up to two days. it works on hard and soft surfaces to help prevent the spread of bacteria and keep your home healthy. lysol is the #1 pediatrician recommended brand. visit lysol.com/missionforhealth >> jimmy: hi there, welcome back. death cab for cutie is on the way. if
runway" but wish it has more bracelets, our next guest has the perfect show for you. it's called "project accessory." watch it thursday nights at 10:00 on lifetime. please say hello to molly sims. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how's it going? >> how are we? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. how are you? >> everything's good. >> jimmy: you retired from modeling. >> i didn't retire. i just -- i thought -- i took a little bit of a break. >> jimmy: you did? same here. i'm taking a break from modeling myself. [ laughter ] >> i just, you know, but i recently come back. i did a cover to be in a bikini that's going to be out in a week. i got it back. >> jimmy: when you have that kind of shoot, do you especially starve yourself right before? >> oh, my god. absolutely. >> jimmy: really? >> people will lie and go, yeah, i eat whatever i want. no, you do everything possible.
everything. >> jimmy: and you got married a couple of months ago? >> yeah, i got married. >> jimmy: congratulations. [ applause ] where did you guys get married? >> in napa. >> jimmy: okay. did everyone get very drunk on the wine up there? >> um, very drunk. we had a bit of a weekend celebration. actually started on thursday and ended on sunday. but it was -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's not bad. if you are going to go up there, you might as well. did you move into a house together or -- >> we moved in -- well, we didn't move in until -- we asked me to marry him on may 20th, which is when i closed escrow but i kind of, like, we kind of thought we were going to be together so i completely gutted the house and, because it was all beige? [ laughter ] no, literally, all beige with one bathroom. >> jimmy: is that bad? i don't know. i don't know about those things. >> one bathroom being red leather, like, red leather
paneling. >> jimmy: oh, this is his house? >> his house. >> jimmy: oh, i see. his house we moved into. we were never going to sell it. all beige. one red bathroom. with, like, so, you know, you kind of, before you get to know someone, you kind of, like, having to go through things before we were actually, you know, engaged and -- >> jimmy: so, you told him, i'm taking over and i'm going to change everything about your -- >> no, no. he only had this one thing, like, every room has swivel chairs, every chair has to -- >> jimmy: what? >> has to be on a swivel. >> jimmy: why? >> so he can see the tv. >> jimmy: judge on "the voice" or something? he can see the tvs? so he can swirl around and look at different tvs? >> yeah. when i was cleaning out, he had massive amounts of electronics. he had seven playstations, xboxes, like, guitar, like, things and -- what is all this [ bleep ]? >> jimmy: you need that stuff.
>> no, i know. >> jimmy: as a guy you need that. >> he really feels -- it's he and i and three dogs, he needs a mancave -- >> jimmy: he does. he has no rooms in the house? >> well, no, he does, but -- i just -- he has to read scripts and watch -- what do you need? >> jimmy: he needs to have a room. he's like a dog. he needs a little house. >> i know. he -- like, was complaining, like, that we were getting on his nerves. i'm like, i was sleeping and -- >> jimmy: well, do you snore? i mean, what are you doing when you sleep? you never know. even a tent in the backyard would be a nice thing. >> i give him -- here's what's changed when i got married. espn. like, it is his life, like, first of all, hey, babe, can we just watch a little, you know, 15 minutes of, you know, espn red zone? >> jimmy: right. >> now, it's morning, come in, we turn it on, watch espn.
we go to bed with it. highlights are, like, two hours. >> jimmy: you never melt a real man before. you were going out with the french model guys. you know, you have to watch espn every 30 minutes, something might change slightly. now, this show "project accessory," this is a spin-off show. >> have you watched "project runway?" >> jimmy: yeah, i watch it all the time. espn on one tv and i swivel over to the "project runway." [ applause ] the idea is people will make -- >> handbags, jewelry and accessories, so, jewelry, watches, whatever, bracelets, necklaces. so, it's really hard because all their materials have to be raw from the beach or storage rooms, like one girl made this amazing necklace out of rat traps. i know. >> jimmy: beautiful. >> that sounded weird, right?
>> jimmy: sounds great. >> it was really amazing. not harder than "project runway" because i'm obsessed with it but they have to be knowledgeable and creative. >> jimmy: almost like hardware. it's not like -- >> it's everything. >> jimmy: wow. >> they make shoes >> jimmy: you think anyone will wear the necklace made of rat traps? >> i would. >> jimmy: you would? >> i know, i would. i would pay a lot of money. i'm surprised. >> jimmy: i think we're all surprised. >> i know. it's a really good show and you can see a lot -- it's all reality. there's a lot of cat fighting in there, too. >> jimmy: cat fighting and mouse trapping. there you go. very good to see you. congratulations. please, give your husband a room. it's all a man needs is a small area. if you need me to mediate, dispute between you, i'd be happy to do that. but a man needs a room of some kind so you don't see what he's actually up to. >> jimmy: molly sims, everybody.
album. here with the song "underneath the sycamore," death cab for cutie. ♪ ♪ lying in a field of glass ♪ underneath the overpass ♪ mangled in the shards of a metal frame ♪ ♪ woken from the dream by my own name ♪ ♪ well i was such a wretched man ♪ ♪ searching everywhere for a homeland ♪ ♪ and now we are under the same sun ♪ ♪ feel it through the leaves ♪ let it heal us ♪ we are the same
♪ we are both safe ♪ underneath the sick ka mother ♪ ♪ we are the same ♪ we are both safe ♪ underneath the sycamore ♪ we were both broken in our own ways ♪ ♪ sifting through the rubble for the wrong things ♪ ♪ i know you've got a vengeful heart ♪ ♪ and i cannot be stopped as soon as i start ♪ ♪ but you have seen your darkest rooms ♪ ♪ and i have slept in makeshift tombs ♪ ♪ and this is where we find our peace ♪ ♪ oh this is where we are at least ♪ ♪ we are the same ♪ we are both safe ♪ underneath the sycamore ♪ we are the same ♪ we are both safe ♪ underneath the sycamore